Dear Family,
I’m looking forward to the NOVA SINGERS who will grace OUR SANCTUARY on Tuesday night. If you haven’t gotten your ticket(s) yet you can probably do so this weekend. But the $15 ticket goes to $20 at the door on Tuesday. It’s one of the nicest outside ‘visitations’ we have during the year and you won’t be disappointed in the quality of the program.
I will be personally happy to have their rejuvenating musical gifts. As I write I’ve just had the news that a wonderful woman, Evelyn McInerney, has died and gone to the Lord. When I was first named a pastor in 1982, Evelyn was my first secretary, hand-holder (always in the presence of her husband Deacon Vince), mother-advisor and fan club president, at least most of the time. I’m sure there were days when I tried her patience.
Last Monday I was driving out of Our Lady Queen of Heaven cemetery where I had joined several priests to be present for the interment of Catherine Hogan, the mother of Msgr. Terry Hogan. Over the years, Terry has been a good friend. Catherine was 93 when she died. In the last few years Terry told us that there had been an onset of stages of dementia. She told Terry she felt like she was in a fog. Terry spoke most movingly about the care Catherine’s husband gave her in the last few years. Terry had just renewed their vows, 71 years married. It made me feel a little bit younger when I realized they were married only four years less than I am. The celebration was a beautiful gift to Terry’s father as well as his family.
I left the cemetery with the intention of going to see Evelyn. I was trying to figure out where the nearest turnpike entrance was. I was sort of wandering around when Annie called me to say that Evelyn’s daughter Karen had called with the news of Evelyn’s death. I had told Karen the other day that I would come down on Monday and was on the way. Karen said it was just like her Mom; she waited until most of the family had just left and then went to the Lord. The same thing happened when my Dad died 48 years ago. We were with him nonstop for the last 24 hours, and when we came home to take a quick break, the hospital called. Mom took the call in the kitchen and we were all at the table. There was dead silence when Mom told us Dad had died. None of us had been there. Then finally my brother Pete said, “Well, it was just like Dad; he was too embarrassed to die in front of any of us.” He meant that Dad simply never wanted or needed attention.
Evelyn was like that, too. She didn’t need attention or fussing over. Of course, that didn’t stop Vince from trying. Her kids are loving and generous people. The explanation lies in the simple goodness of both their parents. It was – and is - their example that shaped their kids.
I stopped the car because I got lost, and just sat there, kicking myself for not having tried to go down to see her sooner. But that’s really a kind of self-pity we can sure do without.
When I talked to Karen she shared her Mom’s last moments. It was a real gift. I found my way out of northwest Broward asking myself, as I have done many, many times with other people, “What does she see?” It fills me with a sense of joyful anticipation, even if I know there is going to be a hole left by the absence of someone who meant a lot to me. Again, that can be awfully selfish. Why wouldn’t I want someone to be with the Lord? Of course, I do, but my joy over that and the hole are going to have to coexist for a while. It took me eight months to cry for my Dad, and I still get twinges for both Dad and Mom. Evelyn will probably get a chuckle out of watching me trying to figure it all out. I hope they are all finding each other, although I suspect that the simple presence of the Lord is totally overwhelming...
In Him,
